asldkjflaskflsdkjflkjfsdlkjfsdlk I don’t know…

“What in the world?” sunlight peered through the blinds in my apartment. 

I could of swore I closed those blinds, and then I see it.  The window latch is broken.  I get up off the couch quickly and grab my gun up off of  the couch.  I move cautiously through my apartment looking for anything out of the ordinary.  God I shouldn’t have testified against that guy.  William Albert had killed two men without leaving fingerprints.  I was the only witness and no one had believed me.  They said Mr. Pottenger had committed suicide and so had Mrs. Albert.  But I watched him push them over the side of the patio.  He threw Mr. Pottenger over because he witnessed it as well.  People said that not being able to save Mrs. Albert is why he committed suicide but it just didn’t add up.  There’s this whooshing sound and I’m knocked against the wall.  I struggle against the body ontop of me. 

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Part 4 of Random Cat Story!!!

As soon as we reach the other cave entrance a horrible stench reaches my nose.  I almost fall off Jeffry the Purple Pegasus.

“Holy Crapoli, what the hell is that!” I exclaim, my eyes watering.

A short, built woman next to me gags “cat spray.”

UGH.  Cat spray.  Another term for cat pee.  Comments come from all around me as the Pegasuses head deeper into the cave like “Oh Dear God” or “Oh sweet baby jesus” or in my case “How the bananas did this much cat pee get everywhere?  Like I’m wondering if they made cat pee febreeze or something.”

Then I shut my mouth because when I open it I can taste it.  After three hours of walking down the wide cave I become concerned.  Shouldn’t we have found something by now?  Ugh, just another day in the US of A I guess.  Freaking bananas.  This sucks.  I just want to be back home to Texas.  After a short break we head on down the cave for three more hours until we reached a huge opening.  I stick my head out the cave and smell nothing, just the clean outside air.  To my confusion I realize the smell of the cat pee is still strong in the cave.  I look down outside the cave.  All I see is the side of a mountain.  Frustrated I begin to climb sideways to a flat surface that somewhat sticks out of the mountain.  Once I reach it I look down cautiously.  It’s freezing cold up here as a result of the altitude and cloudiness.  Wind whips at my face as I try to make out any buildings.  I see a city that seems tiny and then I see it.  The only identifiable building I can see from up here.  Chuckie Cheese.  Horror sweeps over me as I realize that the building that I thought was Chuckie Cheese was not……………………………………………………………………………………………..

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Just kidding yeah it was totally Chuckie Cheese. 

 

Part Three of Random Cat Story

“What the heck was that!” I exclaim, fear creeping into my voice.

“The wind” Steve the unicorn says then rolls his eyes.

“Oh…” I reply embarrassed.

So onward all of us neighbors go, we leave the all the horses outside the cave (except for Steve because he’s a unicorn) and enter the cave with extreme(ish) caution.  After thirty minutes, we’ve reached the end of the cave and guess what?  Our cats aren’t there.
Sighing I look around for anything they could be hidden in, or by.

“Hey look!” Someone points out.

“At what?” I ask, looking everywhere but the place he pointed.

“Up there!” The man says.

I look up and there’s an entrance to another cave…. A cave entrance impossible to reach.

“DAMMIT” I scream flopping my arms around like an idiot.

Just then Steve the Unicorn screeches this weird sound and Pegasuses fly in the cave, prepared to take us up to the other cave.  I jump on top of the white one and we fly up to the other entrance.